How Not To Let The Pain Of A Past Mistake Become Your New Best Friend
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A Poem By Rachael Aprill Phillips
I hurt but I’m a afraid to show it,
I sit in the quietness of my mind and wonder and ponder,
When will this pain leave me,
She steers at her reflection in the mirror, and holds her hand out to the warrior she use to be,
Before pain came to be her weapon for war,
I saw the happy go lucky child who had no care in the world slowly start to fade away, far, far, into the distance far, far away,
Which way shall she go, should she take the road that pain chose?
Only she knows,
Because pain has come to stay, to reconnect with it’s long lost friend,
So now the end most be near,
Unless she sends for the warrior she used to be.
Our Mind is one of our most precious possessions; it’s also a possession that is easy to take for granted. Rarely as human beings do we take stock and hold inventory of our thoughts and perpetual mediation.
But pain is one thought we rarely quickly let go of. It’s like a bad itch we don’t want, but we love the scratching sensation from it. This week I was brought face to face with a past mistake of mine when I was a little child and was reminded of it by a family member of mine.
That Is No Longer Me
But I chose not to allow their assumptions of that little girl I was create and be my present reality as both people where no longer the same person.
How about you?
Pain can be an interesting emotion, even though real, it’s also a lie an invention from the depth of our imagination. Now I’m not saying that the pain you experience right now is not real far from it, but what I’ am saying is pain does not have to be our reality and finial destination.
Creating The Habit Of Forgiving yourself
Forgiving yourself though a simple habit can mean the difference between a healthy productive mind, operating at optimum, able to enable the manifestation of our destiny. Or a troubled storm torn vessel, unable to assist us is in the vicissitudes of life.
In this article I want to highlight four main elements I feel will be deeply useful to consider when we are endeavouring to corral our minds in the direction that will produce the most desired results.
To further lay emphasis on the opportunity we have before us, I would have you consider the fact that a healthy mind more often than not is fundamental to a healthy body. A healthy mind enables us to think creatively and circumstances will invariably bend to the upbeat attitude of a healthy mind.
A healthy mind will attract to it not only healthy circumstances, but also healthy company. It’s been said bad company corrupts good habits. I charge we should choose our thoughts as carefully as we choose our friends and vice versa.
Our thoughts will either take us to our desired destination, or plunge us to our dreaded fates. Our thoughts will ennoble us to feats of courage and determination or rob us of vital energy when life requires an extra push.
Let’s look together at the four things that can greatly improve our thought life and enable our minds to maintain a healthy virile tone that will infuse all of life with purpose, meaning, worth and peace.
Let’s begin with attitude; it’s been said that in all of life’s happenings, the one thing we can choose is our attitude. A negative attitude is one of the surest ways to create emotional and destructive thought through our whole system, and destroy productive relations with our fellow man. Even if we attract many other negative people to our pity party, the ensuing conversations will be so detrimental, we can be sure no positive thing can result. Likewise when we choose in the face of a negative appearing circumstance a positive response, the lessons in the circumstance are learnt, the pain quickly passes and we are ennobled, energized, invigorated. And by default those we come in contact with will reap the benefits.
Our Self Esteem:
A positive attitude is hard to maintain without a healthy self-esteem. Self-esteem is something so deep it affects our thoughts immensely. First please realise that who you are has tremendous value and worth. You may have been told otherwise all your life, and circumstances may have conspired together to compound this notion. But please stop and look into the mirror, tell yourself you love yourself, tell yourself you forgive yourself, tell yourself that you are the most valuable possession you have at your disposal, and invest in yourself. Allow you’re self to change all the destructive self-loathing thoughts; they won’t help you or those around you. The moment you accept yourself and see your worth and invest in yourself the world will become a better place.
The next key thought I want to cover is our mediation, our constant mental fixations, what do we spend our time thinking about? Amidst the various pressures and circumstances life poses, beneath the surface can be a volcano of anxieties, concerns and misgivings. If we don’t discipline our minds and choose to maintain focus our lives can become bogged down in a mire of frustration from which we long to escape. It’s very important in life to have vision. Take time to really consider your aims, purpose and reasons for doing what you do. Allow the sometimes disorienting process of change to operate in your life; be prepared to jettison dead weights that are stifling your progress. Establish your destination, and as you press towards it maintain a healthy meditation on your focus. When anxieties arise meditate on your focus. When you go to bed and when you rise, meditate on your focus. And you will find your thoughts steering your mind which in turn will steer your course and you’ll make it.
And last but by no means least I hope this final thought will add the so needed Icing to the cake; Courage. We addressed anxiety which is a form of fear. Fearful thoughts seek to paralyze our best efforts and sabotage our endeavors. Whether it is a case of self-doubt or the fear of people, apparently insurmountable obstacles or the great unknown. I encourage you to add courage to your arsenal of productive thoughts. Believe you can achieve and you will. Be brave enough to believe you have value despite naysayers. Press beyond the dead past and enter the yet unseen future, confident you’re going to make it, and life will bend to your faith.
Ultimately choose your attitude, recognize your intrinsic value. Take stock of your daily meditations and focus on your vision and purpose, and rise to life’s challenges beginning in your mind, with the courage of believing thoughts and hopeful expectations. And you’ll maintain a healthy mind that will serve you throughout your life;